DRAMA: A Play or A Plague?

Has someone ever told you that you have Drama in your life? Have you ever said to yourself, “My life has too much Drama!” What of other people’s lives? Have the words “Your life is too much Drama!” come out of your mouth?

Drama is the #17 Plague* of our times. Our lives don’t slow down. Time doesn’t slow down. The clock keeps ticking on. And on. And on. Until we go mad! Or we die! Or we just admit we all have DRAMA in our lives!!

So let’s all calm down. Take it down a notch. Or two. or 5.

Drama is all relative. We ALL have drama. We’ve all heard of “The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly.” right? We all have those good and great times in life. Those not so good, bad, difficult times. And Then There’s The UGLY. Those are often the terrible times. The DRAMA times.

Some people seem to never have drama. You know those people? The ones who have it together. You see them and think “Man! I wish I could be half as much as they are because everything goes right for them!” The ones with the right job. Right family. Right home. Right circle of friends. Right everything! --- And then there are the people who always seem to have drama. The ones who always have something to say. Always have a story to tell. You might wish you could help them. Give them “something”, you just don’t know what that something is. You might also wish you didn’t have to talk to them or be near them because you feel uncomfortable. You might feel sheepishly grateful that you don’t have drama in your life. Phew!

Drama is all relative. We ALL have drama. Some people express more- use more descriptive language. Some people barely speak any large words at all. Ever. It is their way. Some have more distinct tones and attitudes towards life. Positive or negative. Sunshine vs Rainpours. Drama is more than just the person speaking about their own lives. It’s about communication. In most cases, the person receiving the information is the one who actually decides if the Giver’s information is Drama. If the Receiver is the one to make that judgment call, then how do we apply this theory to our own lives?

It is well known that the term DRAMA is fabulous when coined with plays. Theatrical endeavours are rarely made of success without superb drama! Yet when DRAMA is set against the human life, immediately lips purse, tisks and head shakes begin, and negativity abounds. So what if we look at this DRAMA from the idea that no one has Drama in their lives until someone else places Dramatic Value there. In other words, if I converse with someone who tells me of a series of events in her life, I now judge them- a quite natural human response, I might add- to be either calm or turbulent events. Positive or Negative. I must decide to be forgiving or accusatory-- all done quite unconsciously-- towards the events told to me. It is I, who decides whether this person’s life is full of DRAMA or not. Not she. So if it is I who decides, then how would I wish others to see me? See my life? Treat my events told? If I am the Giver of the information, how would I want the listener to receive my words?

Drama is all relative. We ALL have drama. It is the transfer of the information- the Communication between humans with individual minds and hearts that can create barriers and/or foster love and tolerance.

The Plague of Drama.

Communication is Key. By doing the following, each of us helps prevent the spread of this awful plague and infection as well as helps heal our own infections. Communication is two ways, so productive positive communication benefits both parties. Every time.

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ACTIVE LISTENING

• Listen to the message-- try to relate to at least two things the person is saying
• Relax your body, especially your face. When your face is relaxed, your jaws are relaxed, and your ears are more open allowing sound to enter more fully. It is easier to hear and less stressful and less “headachey” to relax your entire face and body. 
• Make eye contact--show that you are paying attention 
• Then Pay Attention!

POSITIVE FEEDBACK

• Share how you related to the 2 things the person said while you listened
• Agreeing with statements and Supporting the Giver of information are different. Support the Giver.
• Use “I feel…” statements. These help reduce accusatory negative responses. 
• Use “I feel…” statements. These help share love and appreciation responses.

Communication is a Skill that can be difficult at first. It takes practice! So practice!  

Remember, we all play the roles of the Givers and Receivers in life. As we become better at communication, especially with DRAMA conversations, surprisingly- these conversations will seem less and Less and LESS drama and more simple conversations about LIFE.

‘Til next time,

Arla

*completely fabricated number with absolutely no references to support said statement. I merely like the number 17.

Somewhere between twilight and midnight skies time

I love the sky! I love the clear azure blue; the puffy caricature clouds; the dark stormy seas of swirling clouds lowering deep into tips of funnels while the sky turns green; the soft steel gray where you hear profound silence while snow falls. There are so many amazing skies. I couldn’t possibly describe them all.

Can you see in your eyes the streaks across the sky that light it up like fire in the evening? Clouds must be present to create such beauty. Close your eyes and watch the sun sink lower and lower beneath the horizon. (Well, close your eyes after you’ve read this through once) Dusk is somewhere between that hazy lazy dusky rosey sky and the deep flames that consume the entire sky with it’s brilliance. Twilight is the deeper hues of blues, violets, and purples-- the magical time that lasts only a short few moments. It’s when you turn your back to go inside and at your glance back- it’s gone. You’ve missed it. Sighs all around because now you wait for the midnight sky. Midnight is the deep blackest blue.

But tonight I would like to touch on the Somewhere between the twilight and midnight skies.

I love to go outside at night to talk to God. I love nature. I feel very intune with nature. I feel God has done a Marvelous job creating this world. And sometimes I go outside to talk to Him. It is usually late at night. Midnight sky time. I am a night owl. I can’t remember the last time I saw the sun rise. Sometimes I go out in the afternoon rainstorm sky. I love rain. But it’s usually midnight sky time because everyone is in their homes, so if i feel like talking quietly out loud, I can do so without feeling awkward.

Well, the other night I went out in Somewhere between twilight and midnight skies time. The world was hushed. It was a cold windy night. No one, but me, wanted to be outside. I had been talking to God about something. I was praying for something very specific. You know those moments? Is God listening? Does He listen? Is there a God? Does He know you? Well, I know there is a God. I know He knows me. I know He listens when I pray. But Was He Listening to This Very Prayer??? Right NOW??? I needed Him to hear this prayer. I was outside. But I felt disconnected. And I Always feel connected to God when I’m outside. I was sitting on my stone steps and sighed. I sighed and thought “God isn’t listening right now.” Then I leaned back to rest my arms on the step behind me and I looked up. Do you know what I saw?

No. I did not see God.

I saw the Pecan tree with stars twinkling brightly through the bare winter branches. I stared at them. I traced the graceful lines of the branches that only nature-- through God-- could create. I looked at the stars and was filled with such appreciation that the sky was clear- no clouds to block my view of such wonderment! I felt connected to God. I knew that He in fact was listening to my prayer- that prayer- at that very moment! Gratitude filled my heart.

It amazes me how such a little thing like pecan tree branches and stars could bring comfort and gratitude to my heart. How many times in our lives do we skip past the Somewhere between twilight and midnight skies time thinking those hours are dreary, dreadful, and depressing? When in fact, they are hours filled with pleasantry, peace, and possibilities! What a delightful outlook!

May we all enjoy our Somewhere between twilight and midnight skies time- every day!

‘Til next time,

Arla